Run Report by Wankie Pooh

Well anyone thinking of using this run site – needs to think again if it is raining. It took many runner 30 minutes to move the last kilometre – coming off different express ways – It didn’t seem to matter which way they came.  There were no visible road works or accidents – it is just a bottle neck.

The hares had a glorious afternoon to lay the trail – but at 5.30 the heavens opened big time and the whole world – focused on Bukit Batok….. was pelted with torrents!

Easy parking on a shaded lane. The pack was long gone when we got there – the hares soaked to the skin and in need of liquid sustenance – were not sweeping. A shame! But not for Chastity Belt and I - we slithered up and over the muddy bank and found the entire pack totally frustrated and milling about. At around 6.15 some runner actually ran back to the car park to get a hint from the hares…. ‘It’s over the open grass and then to the left”…. So off we all trotted across the open grass… again some over ran and were called back to a little muddy path up to the left.

What followed was a series of ups and downs and around in a quarry area – open shale hills, mud with boulders that crumbled beneath as you scrambled. Ducking and turning until we came out behind the Migrant Workers Quarters on the East side of Bukit Batok Road. Then north and a web of paths. STFU was ahead and calling nicely as Not Tonight and I chummed up rather than be isolated and lost.  STFU disappeared from view and reappeared behind us… lots of possible paths – all trampled under foot – some cut with machetes, back tracking from the ones with cob webs – Since we were at the back of the pack… this was the clearest of backwoodsman clues that we had become masterful at unravelling.  Paper – such that there was had totally disintegrated and was a papier-mâché draping down leaves – so skid marks in the mud, trampled leaves and broken twigs of earlier hashers were our trail markers.

I understand that the trail then headed over the BB Rd – but because the drain was flooded – runners were encouraged to chance their necks to get over this busy main road – definitely a hash shit offence. Once over in the army area – plenty of running if you wanted it – but we headed back, skirted the model aeroplane (?) club and back.

Circle Report by Wankie Pooh

To calls of Too much rain! Too much paper! Too many Chinamen! They were awarded Hash shit eventually after much rabble rousing. Great T-shirt this year!

Returnees 2- Dimples and Don Kronic

Hares – no whip

Cock Radio stepped into the breech: and gave to Strapless for Year of the Rabbit and for good breeding; Condom Month – therefore to Stiffy; Month to get rid of your Significant – Circle Jerk on behalf of Eleven; and Cherry Month – to Cherry Picker… all made up of course! What drivel we listen to… or perhaps we don’t listen?!!!

Mystery Whip – Handbag – sporting a good cock light……

Something about shaving foam, deodorant, STFU  - husband away, insomnia and different kinds of virgins……?!

Called in the not wearing red – but too many so sent back

Laundry Wala – Princess of Sloth (?)

Twin Towers and Comes Quietly – for her slinky top and struggles with the lacing “ He couldn’t get it in the right hole – but any one will do”

Cock Radio to Handbag for 50 runs T-shirt award from many years ago…….black one

Cock Radio then called Handbag back into the circle for now not having a red shirt

Mystery Mystery Whip – Sly dog

Eleven was reaching an important milestone… has stopped vomiting - big boobs and lots of sex from now on….

To a bright young lad who didn’t recognize the seedy side of Orchard Towers for a long time – even though his office is nearby – STFU 2

Strapless for sporting wooden clogs to avoid stepping in watery excrement of his fellow hashers

AOB

Mad Chinaman to Mother Mary, Big Head and Cumpuss for asking about his banana and offers to help peel it.

STFU 1 overheard a couple discussing her forgotten towel and His underpants that would do instead – Shoe Shopper

Wet Patch called in Knickerless – where is she when needed?

Chastity Belt and Chinese superstitions…. Cannot do and can do…. If you work on the New Year’s Day – you will be working all year. If you get money on the first day then you will have money for the rest of the year….. If you have sex…. Then does it follow…..? To Coo Chi Coo – nominal wishful male!

Shaggy Dick 2 to Twin Towers – for playing music that he had never heard of…. Young and trendy

TBA to Comes Quietly after his trip to NZ gets a face book commentator – “no sheep in the photos!.... “Tasmanian fixation!

Penile Extension – to Handbag…. Story in the newspaper about low IQ but high sex drive Brit to be banned from having sex by UK  Judge… man known as  “Alan” who also thought babies were came from under storks nests!

Cock Radio to Dog Mount – for great rabbit ears!

Thanks Ripper for the loan of the flash light! And Stiffy for the run to the beer truck for me.

On-Back to Weekly Scribe Reports Index.

On-Back to Lion City HHH homepage.