Astronut and Big Head made the circle's first order of business to welcome Armless back to the fold.  He had been away on an extended rehabilitation stint in Germany but now he's back and is ready for debilitizing!  One Herr drinks, all herrs drink.  Herr Armless, Herr Zipp, Hares:  Cheeks Out and Little John and since our pronunciation isn't all that great, why not Aer Lingus as well?!

 

Cheeks out and Big Head were admired and congratulated for their kilts.  The run hares were then brought in and given the GOOD RUN stamp of excellence.

 

Next week's run:  Sylvie Duflot, a Lion City member known mostly by front runners whose circle attendance is worse than Tiger Lily was in the circle to tell us about next week's run.  Another cemetary?  How depressing!

 

 

Virgins:  D Kit

Visitors:  Ringing WEt, Paper View, Vibrator, Winbow, Kannot Kan, Khan the Cobra, Priscilla, Penile Extension, Handbag, Cucumber, and Shortherr

Returnees:  Herr Zipp, Pubic Zipp, King Leer, Herr Lingus, Cunning Linguist, and Steptoe

 

Virgin D Kit was brought back in for paying too much attention to Goodie Bag and Suzy Wong when he should have been listening to what was happening in the circle.  King Leer and Aye Aye were also chastized, and they seemed to like it, for tittering away instead of listening with wrapped attention!  Give them all a note?  Why were they born so beautiful?

 

Hare Whip Cheeks Out for the Boys tells us that laying with her husband is not easy.  Oh, I mean laying a run with her husband...   You see, there are just too many oportunities for arguments to arise.  Case in point:  Little John draws an arrow on the underside of a bucket.  However a bucket, as we all found out, can be picked up and turned around.  Do you think Little John would listen to her when she pointed this out to him?  Of course not!  Nonetheless, the charge isn't for Little John, but for the bastard who actually turned the bucket around and sent everyone in the wrong direction.  On in Machine!  One German drinks...  ALL Germans drink!  After Machine's charge, Cheeks Out told us:  "I only have two."  This left the men in the crowd wondering if other women had more, and why we were not yet aware of this.  But, after clarifying, we learned that she meant "charges".  Her second when to a female hasher who had confided that she wasn't up for a long run and would appreciate it if Cheeks Out would point out any shortcuts so she wouldn't be the last one back.  When Cheeks Out actually provided this service, said Harriet gratefully headed down the right trail, stopped and yelled:  "BASIL!  IT'S THIS WAY!"  Bring in both of the Towers!  Twin Towers and Fawlty Towers!  Give 'em a note!

 

Mystery Whip:  Loose Change let all of us know just how stressful it can be owning two cars.  She apparently always comes in the blue one.  On this evening, Slack Arse came all the way from the plane!  I'm not sure what this had to do with cars but in any case, they ended up in the red car with GPS and still got lost!  GPS to find Kranji?  Give him a note!  Next in, Cheeks Out for the Boys.  Before this night's run, Little John pointed out that the large yam leaves should not be used for wiping your bum as they can leave a nasty rash.  Loose Change couldn't understand why someone with a backpack full of perfumed, pink toilet roll would bother using a yam leaf to wipe his bum, but then she figured that he was using that as an excuse for his limp that was actually caused by Cheeks Out over checking his crystal balls!  Next in:  Hooray.  It seems he just got back from a beach resort in .... Hmmm.... K.L.  His room was a bit far from the beach, but the halls were lined with ladies of the night.  Here's to beach bum, he's true blue.  Lastly, Loose Change mentioned that when one drinks beer, one gets heavy.  Coo Chi Coo replied that when he drinks beer, she gets sexy!  Then Loose Change noticed that she had something on her front.  "They're tits dear."  So...  where were we...  oh yes...  Because beer is fattening, Twin Towers decided to forgo it from Gin and Tonic.  Unfortunately, Fawlty Towers mistook her bottle of G&T for shower water or shampoo or something and he ended up losing the bottle in the bush.  Lovely image, I know...  A bush in hand is better than two bottles in the bush...

 

Mystery-Mystery Whip:  Stiffy called Armless into the circle and thanked him for coming back to Lion City after a fact-finding mission to Germany.  Armless than invited G-string and Tiger Lily into the round to thank them for without them, the monument from whence we started our run would not exist.  I'm pretty sure Armless said:  "Whence".  So Stiffy gave the 3rd and 2nd place finishers from 1945 a down-down, and all the winners sang!  Bronze, silver and Gold!!!  Next Stiffy called in Slack Arse who when consulted as to which way to go, replied:  "I'm going in the only sensible direction...  I'm following Goodie Bag!"  Next Goody Bag, Eleven and Twin Towers were called in to demonstrate their splits ability wear skirts that prevented them from gaining access to the Ministry of Sound!

 

MMMW:  Oh God!  Another one?  Circle Jerk arrived late for the run so he didn't see much to charge people for until...   Twin Towers and Fawlty Towers arrived back to the circle by TAXI!  SHAME!  Next, Shaggy Dick Too, when he wasn't dressed like mini-Spidey last week happenned to be wearing the exact same clothes as Circle Jerk.  As a result, after a charge in the circle, Eleven walk back out and stood right next to Shaggy Dick Too waiting for him to put his arm around her.  Master of Disguise just to steal a girlfriend.  How low!?  I guess she knew who to turn to in her moment of need.  In any case, Circle Jerk brought waterbottles for Shaggy Dick Too to carry in HIS pants, but these go down the front, and were quite phalic to say the least.  Give him a note...  and a beer because he's not pissed....

 

RUN AWARDS:  and a lot of naked people!

950 Hooray

550 Machine

750 Impossible

150 Shoe Shopper

550 Poser

50 Eleven

450 Saliva

150 Comes Quietly

150 Ditch

 

AOB

Winbow from Jakarta had a charge for Paper View, which may actually be spelled:  Pay Per View judging by her penchant for exposing herself.  After a short collection, we saw that she too had two...

 

Tiger Lily brought in Cock Radio who had been complaining of swelling after runs.  She rubbed to Tiger "Lily" balm on his knees and other things began swelling.  Give him a note... and a cold shower!

 

Kannot Kan called Pay Per View back in and asked her if hashing in Washington DC was good since there was so much Bush in the White House..?  Her response....  another double shot.  Helluva day to forget the VDO camera!

 

Tiger Lily called in Goodie Bag and Sylvie Duflot for a stretching show down.  Guess who won?  Give both of the flexible ones a note.

 

Prick of the Week:  Tiger Lily gets it for claiming that she has such good eyesight when someone asked why they were following her!  Two minutes after, they were lost!  She's the meanest!