THE COMMITTEE”S BIG BANK JOB.
Hares: Shoe Shopper, Slocum and Shaggy Dick Too.
Location: Outside The British Club.
The Run: It was a bit of a change to be outside the grounds of the prestigious British Club. Not only that, but also to have the backing of a world famous financial institution. “The local Bank” if the adverts are anything to go by. With this in mind it was not surprising to see a big turnout with a handful of bankers thrown in.
The run took a slightly different route to get to Bukit Timah Nature Reserve and offered a short and a long option. Most people were home in around an hour.
The ON ON was a superb affair free flow booze and good Indian food. Stiffy awarded the HSBC crew a tankard for supporting the event. Normally it takes a hasher a couple of hundred runs to get a tankard, these guys got one on their first. It’s amazing what a thousand quid can do!!!
The party went on until midnight and the dance floor got a good work out with the help of some great sounds. A big HHH thank you to Herr Zip for doing the music and of course to Stiffy for organizing the whole thing.
The Verdict. Good Run, Too many bankers.
Virgins: ON IN all the HSBC gang. Slocum had them all in for a welcome drink and a bit of an introduction. For some reason Boo had flat chests on his mind, I’m not sure why because a couple of those girls were anything but flat chested!! The boys also got a song, maybe they deserved it, who knows?
Visitors Big Foot, Eager Beaver, Peter, Mark, Louise, Grover, Not Good Enough.
Returnees: Black Widow.
Hare Whip: Shaggy Dick Too mentions that the hares were organizing what time to meet up for a reccee last Sunday. Slocum said that is couldn’t be before ten o’clock as he had to sort the maid out!! No problem said Shoe Shopper and Shaggy Dick Too, by twenty past on the Sunday morning they were still waiting, how long is he going to be with the damn maid? Slocum by name Slocum by nature. When he did arrive his hair was a mess and his socks were long gone and he had a bloody smile on his face for the whole morning.
There was a short and a long run so that walkers and runners alike could be back at the run site for just after seven. Topless and Steptoe decided to walk the second half of the long run; it’s a long walk back from the top of Hindhede Drive to the British Club!
Slocum brings Shoe Shopper in for a fine display of her sporting prowess which is only to be expected as she is after all a P.E. teacher. They were having a drink half way around a reccee when S D 2 threw a water bottle to her, she didn’t quite make the catch and the water bottle ended up in the drain, good job the kids weren’t watching!!
Mystery Whip: In And Out brings Pubic Zipp in with her finger ball bandaged up, he’d asked her how she had hurt it, and she replied that she had stuck it on a dirty prick!! Nothing new there then!
At some point Phoney Dick made a big deal out of someone letting rip with a big fart!!! Hmmmm.
Next he had a whole bag of goodies for Black Widow. Apparently she’d lost her wardrobe and was struggling to find black. There was a pair of naughty black knickers, a little lacy black bra, a black cape and to top it off a black hat. Black Widow, the only condition is that you need to be wearing these in the circle next week!
In And Out had read in the newspaper that men are cleverer than women. This is the sort of statement that needs proving and he was up to the challenge. A selection of hashers were called in to form a male and a female team to answer a few simple questions. Here’s a couple of reminders.
Why have women got small feet?
The girls had no idea, the men replied;” So they can stand closer to the sink”. Well done boys another point.
What do you call a woman who has lost 93% of her intelligence?
Again the girls were clueless, the boys reply; “Divorced” There was no competition.
A whitewash, the boys won hands down And the point has been conclusively proved, well done In And Out a great survey, though from the look on Suzy Wong’s face you may be spending some quality time on the settee over the weekend.
Mystery Mystery Whip: Deceased was a little bit put out when he was propositioned on the run. Now I only caught the end of this charge and may have missed something, but as far as I can remember Stiff had asked if he could be Deceased’s wife. Hang on a minute, this isn’t the Monday hash!! Rule number 1 No Poofters. “He aught to be publicly pissed on.........”
Next he had Boo and Strapless in for trying to short cut, they didn’t quite make the short cut as they were called back to the pack like the couple of naughty boys they are.
Another naughty boy, Neal, was in next. He’d brought along a virgin who didn’t have a clue about hashing and then left the poor bugger to fend for himself. Fortunately Deceased was around to make sure he got backing time for a beer, otherwise he’d probably still be out there.
Half Cut had been on holiday to Bali to celebrate her birthday and the GM had something planned for her. Not only did she get a birthday cake, a birthday song and a birthday down down but she got a couple of almost naked birthday stripogram Adonis’s. It must have cost the hash a fortune to have talent like that getting their kit off in public. Half Cut wasn’t fazed one bit and is obviously used to this kind of attention. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Rumor has it that Cock Eyed has been spending so much time in a local sex shop that he’s got an account there, not only that but he tries everything out on the sales girl, and why not!
Ditch brings in Running Shit for not paying attention to bikes trying to overtake. He must have been here too long has gone local, he couldn’t hear lah.
Finally Shoe Shopper brings in all the very well coordinated boys wearing white t shirts. “Drink it down down down down”
ON ON: The rooftop garden of the British Club.
On on Shaggy Dick Too.
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